Espa at Slinfold Country Club

I am so relaxed I have just poured a glass of water down my front. Yup, I am so chilled and floppy that I'm not entirely sure that I'm safe to drive, I feel as if I have just had a lovely nap in a bed made of er, marshmallows.

This morning I was treated to an Espa holistic face, back and scalp treatment, one of Espa's signature massages, and one I was truly looking forward to following an over-optimistic gym session the day before that left me with a dreaful aching neck and niggling headache (well, I was watching the guy with the tattoo on the cross-trainer and wasn't concentrating as much as possibly I should have).

The Retreat is the new spa area at the refurbished Slinfold Golf and Country Club, a few miles south of Horsham. With its beautiful cedar clad pool, Turkish steam room and bubbling hot tub the urge to just splash about rather than actually try out the magnificent gym is overwhelming, but I managed to drag myself away from my coffee in the Member's Lounge and hobble to the Retreat, where I was greeted by Emily, my therapist.

Lest you think Emily is providing me with some sort of psychological support, she is in fact a fully trained Espa therapist who led me into a beautiful treatment room, decorated in a way that I wish my bathroom looked, but sadly doesn't.

Emily then gave me the choice of different oils for my treatment, before giving me a few minutes so I could get undressed before lying face down on a massage bed with my head facing through a hole, above a steamy bowl with one of my chosen oils in. For a moment I was unsure if the bowl was there to catch the dribble as I fell asleep, but nope, apparently inhalation is just another way of letting the oil's properties into the body.

Ironically enough, the oil I was drawn to was called "Fitness." Yes, if you have ever seen me indulge in any form of physical activity then you'll understand my point. Emily remarked that people were generally attracted to oils with properties that their body needed, but the heady blend of rosemary, clove and Indian Bay instantly had me thinking of a boyfriend I had when I was 19 and left me pleasantly daydreaming while my back was first exfoliated and then massaged.

I did withstand the urge to dribble before being turned over on to my back for a dreamy facial and then a thoroughly relaxing scalp massage (I did spend quite a lot of time wondering how many hot flannels were used during the treatment, and how they managed to keep the waffle towels so luxurious and fluffy when mine always end up slightly crunchy?). The facial in particular was excellent, tailored to each person's particular needs, in my case, dry and sore with a hint of leftover porridge.

Anyway, as soon as Emily left me to get dressed, I picked up my glass of water, not realising my arms were no longer accepting instruction from my brain and tipped the lot down my relaxed frontage. That woke me up a bit.

And the result? Well, the dreamy feeling lasted all day, despite a ton of emails to plough through when I got back to my desk, and no less than three people said how lovely my skin looked and was I having an affair?

The treatment costs £70 but would make a wonderful treat for someone who has just got back from a long trip, and we'd heartily recommend Slinfold Club as a wonderful place to spend some time, whether you lounge in the jacuzzi or have a drink on the beautiful terrace.

By the way, the first person to guess how many flannels were used during the treatment will win a little GTC gift, so email us!!